Asshole

Game Type: Card - A

Supplies:

  • At least 5 players
  • Deck of cards
  • Drinks

Instructions

This is a slightly complex game, but very, very fun when mastered. This game requires a minimum of 5 people to play.

The first hand of asshole is the establishing hand. This will decide who is the President, V-Pres, Normal People, and the Asshole for the next round.

Approximately 6 or 7 cards are dealt to each player, depending on the number playing this can be higher or lower. The rank of the cards is as follows (most powerful to least powerful) 2, A, K, Q, … 4, and 3.

Someone is chosen to go first and they play a card, the next person has two options:

  1. To play a card higher than (but not the same) as the previous card.
  2. To pass on that turn.

For example, if a 4 is lead, a next player must play HIGHER than a 4, the the next player has to play higher than that. A new hand starts when all players pass, or when someone plays a 2 (the most powerful card). The last person to play a card, leads the next hand.

This proceeds until all players are rid of their cards. The first player out of cards is the Pres for the next round, the next out becomes the VP, the next players out are normal, and the last person out is the Asshole.

However lets say that the person leading has two 5's, this person may play them both, then the next player must play two of the same card HIGHER than five; this player cannot play one card or three cards, only two. As well, three, or even four, of the same card may be lead. The only time a player may lay one card in a situation like this is if it is a two (the power card); a single two, beats everything, and the hand ends followed by a new lead.

The roles for each player are as follows:

  • President: can make any player drink at any time, no-one may make the President drink but self. The Pres is the first player to start each round (benefits of power). And the Pres should never have to refill own beer.
  • Vice Pres: can make any player drink at any time (except Pres), the only the Pres or self can make the VP drink. The VP goes second in each round.
  • Normal People: These players can make each other drink as well as the Asshole. They play in the order they finished the previous round; first normal out follows the VP, second normal out follows first, etc.
  • Asshole: for many reasons, this player is truly the Asshole. This player has to do all dealing of cards, all sweeping of cards after the hands, and can not make any other player drink. The asshole plays last in each round.

A few recommendations, at the end of each round, the players should move seats in order to reflect the hierarchy, and proper playing order. Play your lowest cards first. Abuse the power when Pres or VP, but remember it will always come back to haunt you, especially when abusing the Asshole.

Play as many rounds as desired.

Modified rules:

  1. First of all, the ideal number of people to have play is four. If more than four play, take out enough cards (starting with the threes) or add jokers (jokers come in as high cards - higher than the two) to make sure everyone will be dealt an even number of cards. If more than seven are playing, use two decks of cards. (Hierarchy of cards (l->h) 3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,J,Q,K,A,2,Joker)
  2. The object of the game is to get rid of your cards first. The person who gets rid of their cards first becomes President, the next becomes VP, and so on.
  3. The idea of the hierarchy (President,VP,Treasurer,. . .,asshole) is that as soon as the cards are dealt you can make anyone below you drink. Asshole also has some extra jobs. He must shuffle the cards, sweep the cards after each round is played, and fill everyone's drink. If there is too much for the asshole to do, and the game is slowing down, vice-asshole will be requested to assist the asshole in his duties.
  4. Before the hand starts, President gives the asshole his lowest card, and asshole gives the President his highest card. If either is caught not giving his absolute lowest or highest card (this means breaking up a pair of threes if you are the President) they are automatic asshole for the next hand. If eight or more are playing, President and asshole exchange their *two* highest and low-est cards, and VP and vice-asshole exchange their *one* highest and lowest card.
  5. The President leads off the *first* round. After the first round, whoever won the last round leads the next round. If the person who won threw his last card, the lead follows to the left.
  6. After the first card is led, play follows down the hierarchy. When play reaches you, you can play or pass. You can play by matching the card played or by playing a higher card. Also, if a single card is led, you must follow with a single card. If a pair is led, you must follow with a pair, and so on. If you can not match or beat the card or cards played, you must pass play to the next player. Even if you can play on the cards, you may choose to pass anyway (to save your high cards). The last card played wins the round.
  7. Once a person leads, play only goes around *once*. For example, if the President leads with a 5, VP plays a J, Treasurer plays a 2, and the asshole passes, the round ends, and the Treasurer leads since he won that round.
  8. Play continues until everyone has thrown all of their cards and the hierarchy is established for the next hand.

Other fun ways to drink more:

  • Before the hand starts, someone must give the President a toast (this is an opportune time to kiss-ass to the President). If no toast is presented, the President can give out his own punishment.
  • There is a "social" (everyone must drink) when three cards of the same value are played in one round. Not only for three cards played by different people, but also for triples!
  • Then there is the board meeting. Everyone starts drinking and is not allowed to stop drinking until the person above him stops drinking (i.e. the VP cannot stop until the Pres. Stops, the Tres. Cannot stop until the VP stops, et cetera). As you can see, this another disadvantage of being the asshole (low man on the totem pole). Only the President can call a board meeting.

Well, I think that about covers the rules. It can sound like a difficult game at first (don't try to learn it drunk), but it provides hours and hours of entertainment.